A New Leaf
Tuesday, February 22, 2011 at 09:52AMWell, here we are. The present is now. I guess that means life is changing.
So it's been an exciting and busy year for me. The biggest change is that I've gone full-time indie. I'm still trying to figure out exactly what that means, but it's finally starting to feel comfortable.
GDC is coming up, and for the first time, I will be attending. This has brought into focus several aspects of my career that I've neglected, mainly revolving around the way I participate in and present myself to the game development community and the rest of the world.
I'm determined to put myself out there more, in all meanings of the phrase. There have been some good changes already:
I've gotten back onto twitter, at least in a small way. I feel like now that I'm doing game development full time again, I might have interesting things to say. Though to be honest, I still don't feel like Twitter is a very effective communication platform. I guess I just don't get it.
Design Dojo, the game design discussion group I run with Nels Anderson, has been a success. It's still evolving and growing, and almost two years in, we are still trying to figure out what exactly it wants to be. But we are having a good time running it, I'm learning lots, and I love hanging out and talking design more than almost anything. I still feel in my heart that this group could become something big and world-changing, and I know that the single greatest factor preventing that is that I'm not giving it the love and attention it deserves. I don't know if I can do that just now though, what with everything else going on, so I make no promises here.
The Vancouver Indie Meetup, run by Alex Vostrov and Jake Birkett, has been phenomenal as well. It's been such an encouragement to me to discover all these other people in the Vancouver area who are on the same journey as me, that I can share with and learn from. Mostly though, I'm just going to hang out. There are two critical steps I need to take to really get the value I should from this group. The first, is I need to give to it in a big way. Jake and Alex have been harassing me to give a presentation for quite some time now, and I keep waffling on them. I hate public speaking, but I know it's the right thing for me to do. GDC has come along and provided me with a convenient excuse for not speaking at this next meetup, and I really need to get past that and just do it. The second thing is that I need to start engaging my fellow indies on a more professional level, so that we can tangibly assist and benefit eachother instead of merely providing encouragement and socialization.
Importantly, I have just released my first game developed fully independently. With the help of Lara Kehler and Mike Labbe, Zombie Minesweeper is live on Kongregate. This is a pretty huge step, and a week and a half later I'm still buzzing inside from the satisfaction. I'll be writing more about this one directly in the near future.
Which brings me to the things which I still need to do to really turn things in the right direction:
First and foremost, I need to make more games. Each person has their own way of adding to the conversation, and I know that mine is with practical examples. I feel dirty when I talk about game design ideas that I haven't proven, of when I discuss my skill and have not shown it off. I'm going to try to be happy and outgoing, but I know that I won't really be able to until I have the weight of proof sitting behind me. And besides, that's what I'm here for anyways! All this, and I mean all this, is in service of ultimately making more games and making better games.
But even before I'm satisfied with my portfolio, I need to be part of the conversation more. Twitter and Buzz are a start to this, and firing up my blog again is a part to this. I need to tell people what I think, I need to add my 2 cents to the pile. I often feel like my opinion doesn't matter (see previous paragraph), but it does matter, and as little worth as it may have, it's utterly worthless if I don't release it to the world.
I need to make more developer friends. I have many developer acquaintances, but not many people I can just talk to openly and honestly about my work and life. This is also part of the aim of joining the conversation. I know that us developers tend to be shy introverts, and there are people out there just like me that I need to get to know, but it isn't going to happen until I step out and make my presence known.
There are many changes I should make in my life that aren't related directly to game design, but I feel like many of the shortcomings I percieve in my career and life are due to a lack of focus and willful distraction. I feel like if I really want to get this new life as an independent game developer kicked off, I need to really focus on it and give it my full attention. So this is my plan, this is my new leaf. Here goes nothin'.
